My Favoite resturant
Comments: 1
Gabby’s
Gabby’s is the best restaurant in the world. It has huge shrimp and fries. Some shrimp you can’t even devour in your mouth. The fries are long as your arm. To eat there you have to have a ginormous appetite. Sometimes you have to spit your food with someone else to devour it.
Gabby’s is the best restaurant in the world. It has huge shrimp and fries. Some shrimp you can’t even devour in your mouth. The fries are long as your arm. To eat there you have to have a ginormous appetite. Sometimes you have to spit your food with someone else to devour it.
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brunsmana
on March 6, 2006 at 1:30 PM
Josh,Good topic sentence. "Devour" and "Enormous" are a good word choices. Nice simile comparing fries to your arm. Your last sentence doesn't make sense.
Fluent Paragraph:1/2
Varying beginnings:2/2
Varying sentence length:2/2
lingering words:1/1
creative word choices:1/1
powerful verbs, specific nouns & adjectives:1/1
correct grammar conventions:1/1
Total:9/10
Good work Josh. This is a well written, concise piece. Next time reread your work to make sure your sentences all make sense. I can tell you spent time revising your piece.
Good work and effort,
Mrs. Brunsman
