Amazon Rain Forest entry #3
Comments: 1
In the future, we might still have the Amazon Rain Forest and the
Yanomami people may be able to continue living there. The problems occured around the 1960's when people were encouraged to live in the rainforest. Trees were cut down for roads, sawmills, and
loggers. When gold was discovered in the Rain Forest, tons of miners
came into the area which brought back diseases that wiped out all the
villages. Such diseases are, Malaria, Influenza, and Whooping Cough.
Numerous people have tried to help and land has been set aside for Yanomami people, but that does not protect them or the land. In 2004, 10,000 square miles of the Amazon Rain Forest were cut down! Even outsiders just come in and cut down trees for nothing. Also, soil can't can't sustain crops or cattle. Everything is just dying. Some loggers come in and cut down valuable trees. For example, Mahogany which is used for doors, guitars, and coffee tables. Correspondingly, 80% of logging is illegal, timder is illegally logged and acquired!
The Rain Forest may be saved! The Brazilian government has been getting serious about stopping it. Brazil is working with WWF and other organizations to set up the Amazon Region Protected Area. It consists of 80 reserves and parks. It will protect about 12% of Rain Forest. They are trying to make sustainable land and give people living there a stake in the process.
Numerous people have tried to help and land has been set aside for Yanomami people, but that does not protect them or the land. In 2004, 10,000 square miles of the Amazon Rain Forest were cut down! Even outsiders just come in and cut down trees for nothing. Also, soil can't can't sustain crops or cattle. Everything is just dying. Some loggers come in and cut down valuable trees. For example, Mahogany which is used for doors, guitars, and coffee tables. Correspondingly, 80% of logging is illegal, timder is illegally logged and acquired!
The Rain Forest may be saved! The Brazilian government has been getting serious about stopping it. Brazil is working with WWF and other organizations to set up the Amazon Region Protected Area. It consists of 80 reserves and parks. It will protect about 12% of Rain Forest. They are trying to make sustainable land and give people living there a stake in the process.
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brunsmana
on May 10, 2006 at 10:07 AM
Lily,Great improvement. The revisions made your summary more clear.
2/2 listed the main ideas in the first sentence
2/2 details support the main idea in the first sentence
2/2 supporting details are written in sequence
2/2 summary is brief
2/2 includes facts instead of opinions
2/2 rephrased author�s words
3/3 correct spelling
2/3 complete sentences with varying beginnings
3/3 followed grammar rules
Total: 20/21 points
Mrs. Brunsman